School has basically taken its toll in me, somehow, I guess. I recently found out that I've lost 3kg in a semester. & that is quite/rather shocking. I never expected myself to lose that much weight in such a short time. My friends were even encouraging me to bulk up during that period of time, and I did try. I have supper whenever my mom cooks (which is at least 3/7 nights) and I run/exercise more than I ever did after JC. Hahahahhha which is pathetically close to zero. Anyhow, I still lost weight. I didnt actually realize, until many people came up to me telling me I looked skinnier (which is soooooo bad). I didnt believe at first, because I have been eating my meals regularly and eating supper quite often. I mean, I should be gaining weight right? :/ The truth came to light when I went to see the doc at UHC because of my cough + sore throat and fever a few days back. The woman at the register counter told me to take my weight. And the machine showed 39.0 kg. Yuppppppp my current weight now. Very what the hell right, I know. The people I've told that I lost weight have been telling me I'm too skinny, they're worried for me, I need to eat more, what happened to me, do I have worms in my tummy, eat more buffet/good food, exercise more to increase my appetite, etcetc. You know, it's really not that I dont want to gain weight. My body is acting so weirdly :( I really really appreciate all those who showed care and concern. I genuinely do. But I am really trying, so trust me, I am doing my best to put on some weight and 'look healthy' again :) I think I kind of look scarily thin now, judging by all the comments I've received from my friends. I just hope I dont have worms in my tummy :/ :/ :/
Truth to be told, I actually think the main reason behind my weight loss is because of my appetite. I have been losing appetite quite often, ever since Uni started. Am I stressed up? Maybe.. I guess so. :( I dont really know the reason behind, but I'm guessing it's the stress I get from school. Hmm, recently I fell sick after CNY(as mentioned above), and my appetite dropped too. I can get by lunch with just less than half of what is on my plate, which is really really bad :( I dont know why too. Maybe it's because I'm sick huh? I've been falling sick more often than I ever do, after uni has started :( Colds, fever and vomitting. Sighzzz never knew I would be this weakkkkk >:(
By the way, I am back to blogging because I dont really want to bother my friends with such minor issues by tweeting- because my friends know I'm upset if I tweet something unhappy rightttttt? So, I've decided to write them down here. Anyway no one reads this, so I'm guessing it's quite safe? (See the irony of this, HAHAHAHA) And yup, I am quite bothered by something my friends have been talking about, because I realized that I am never significant basically wherever I go. Haha, sad to say but it's the truth. Whatever, at least I know I am loved by the King, my jc friends, my BFFs. That's enough to know right? I shouldn't be so bothered lah, sighhhh. What's not meant to be will never be. I shouldn't force myself to fit in, freak ittttttttttt.
Yup, so that's about it for my rant this time round. Till then! <3
NOTE TO SELF: COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS
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